Welcome to the first ever segment of Heart attack Wednesday! Today on the menu we have Swiss Cheese Gourgère (2/3 cup butter, plus extra for greasing and 9 oz. swiss cheese), Beef Stroganoff (1/2 cup butter, 1 cup heavy cream) and Mocha Cake (1 cup of butter in the icing). Yeah, I feel sick just thinking about it. I also might also be feeling sick from the fact that I ate all that too :/
Today was another off day in the food department. But an off day full of new vocab words! Here’s kind of how things played out earlier:
Me: Mocha cake ingredients-4 eggs, 1/2 cup superfine sugar, 1 scant cup flour…scant? Wait what? MOM! What’s scant mean?
Mom:look it up. (thanks mom…)
I found out it means “no more than”. So basically no more than 1 cup flour, or they’re calling the flour police on you. Duh duh duh…
Me:mix until the mixture has trebled in volume….what?!?! Trebled? Who uses that word…mom?
Mom:it means thrice
Me: *blank stare*
Mom: It means tripled.
Ok I understand boiling something until it has been reduced, and maybe I even get mixing until it’s doubled in volume. But tripled?!?! How can you even kinda tell? “Well! This mixture has definitely seen a 200% increase. By golly, I’d say it’s trebled!”Ha, yeah right. I just stir until my arm starts killing me.
The Swiss Cheese Gourgère was…special…it looked very pretty, but tasted not so pretty. It was a major swiss cheese overload, and I didn’t even use as much as it called for. That’s really all I have to say about it. Don’t make it unless you have zero taste buds.
The Beef Stroganoff would have turned out ok if SOMEONE *EHEM* who I kindly asked to help (big mistake) hadn’t combined the milk and lemon juice together. It tasted fine, but it kinda looked like Cream of Wheat Stroganoff. Luckily, Mr. JJR swooped down from the sky with his magical stirring talents and saved the day.
Mocha cake. The educational cake of many confusing words. I’m not sure if Italians like their cake wafer-thin and having a texture like raccoon meat, but I don’t. It might have been, hands down, the most disgusting, revolting and weirdly amazing cake I’ve ever had. It tasted really really good, but was about 0.7 centimeters thick and dense. And the “frosting” goop was more like coffee-flavored liquidy butter. But that didn’t stop me from eating it ;)
Tune in next Wednesday when we have Deep-fried Butter with a Butter-cream sauce! Ack. Next week I’m only making vegetables.
And now that I’m about to go into heart failure, look what I have to look forward to right now…