Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels…except for cake. But skinny’s a close second.

You can just call me Dr. Picco. Why you ask? Because I diagnosed myself today. I have CED-Constant Eating Disorder (which I thought was pretend until I just googled it…). I eat pretty much 24/7, whether I’m hungry or not. And when I’m truly hungry, I’m like “I’M GOING TO DIE!!! I NEED FOOD!” I finally noticed I need to change my eating habits when I was on my 4th rib a few nights ago and I realized I don’t even like ribs. So as of a few days ago, I am on Atkins. *pause for laughter*

My mom and I are having a competition to see who can lose the most weight by June 9th.  We’re both scarily competitive, so I’m not sure this is the best idea. We might both end up like Kate Moss by the end of it…

My friend’s family raises cows. Long story short, we were lucky (is that the right word?) enough to purchase 1/2 a cow. Only problem was it kept falling over *ba dum bum chh* :) Ahh, I’m sorry. It’s too early for me to be funny/enjoyable… but anyway, we have the meat from 1/2 a cow in our basement. You know what gets boring? Beef 5x a week. There are only so many ways you can make beef interesting. So I tried to shake things up and make hamburgers. I’m not entirely sure how exactly that “shook things up”, but hey, I tried.

I kind of improved my own recipe and it actually turned out ok. I mixed 2 pounds of ground beef with 2-ish tablespoons of lemon pepper seasoning, some Worcestershire sauce and BOOM, instant deliciousness. Well, instant deliciousness after I cooked them.

But do you know the BEST part about being on a diet? You can hardly eat anything!!!!!! This was my dinner:

*insert depressed face*

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14 thoughts on “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels…except for cake. But skinny’s a close second.

    • If by Heart Attack Mondays you mean Heart Attack Wednesdays, than yes, I miss them too. I miss my cholesterol being 1500, gaining 7 pounds with every bite, but most of all, I miss you messing up the beef stroganoff ;)

  1. Caught up on your blog today and so very glad I did. I love your very witty one-sided banter. And remember…beef is your friend! ~~~Mrs. H.

    • Thank you! Well, my very witty one-sided banter loves you too. Does that make sense…??? No. Nevermind.

      If we keep eating beef at the rate we are, it won’t be my friend for long…. :)

  2. Picco is back and in fine fettle (with some very clever repartees) and—with beef in the kettle. Now when I visit you and ask: Where’s the beef???—-I will know where to find it.

    Thanks for the skinny on how you are going to get skinny. Hoping to see some before and after pictures. My recommended diet exercise is to put your two arms straight out and—push yourself away from the table. A person should always leave the table a little bit hungry. I hope you will give up your old CED and come up with a new one – Continuous Eating Desisted.

    Good luck with your latest MISSION Possible!!!

  3. I messed up the beef stroganoff? Why was I even in the kitchen???

    I hate Grampy’s diet.

    I love you just the way you are.

    I’m going to win.

    • I DON’T KNOW. All I remember is you pouring the heavy cream in with the meat and it curdling…

      I hate it more. I don’t have self-control like that.

      Psh, thanks.

      In your dreams, woman.

  4. It appears that my diet ideas are being excoriated. At the risk of being considered ready for the looney bin, here are a few more parting shots. Some people eat to live and others live to eat. I am in the former category and consider food to be a necessary evil.

    It took a while, but I have learned to live without eating desserts, even ice cream—and you can too!!! Having dessert every day is a habit that can be broken.

    I am ready for the slings and arrows!!!

  5. Hi Picco. I also miss Lady M’s contributions. She had better hurry up as she, you, and I (and maybe others) will not be around after May 21, 2011.

    Hey Shug (that is Southern for Sugar),

    I was wondering about you and that off limits area called the kitchen. During my latest visit to your abode, I happened to notice a recently delivered book on the shelf by the front door. It happened to be a cookbook. More specifically it was a cookbook designed for Mommy’s. Wonder whatever happened to that cookbook. Was it returned, was it put into file thirteen or is it collecting dust???

  6. Hahaha! Ah, I love your sense of humor, brilliant! Your burgers look great! I so wish I had 1/2 a cow’s worth of meat in my freezer… that’d be nice. I hear it’s a great way to save $$ on beef + you know where the meat came from. Anyway, good stuff. Good luck on your Atkins!

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