Thank you, internet, for making me look like I have a life.

One of the best parts about blogging (or facebook, or twitter etc.) is that it makes your life seem SO much more exciting than it actually is. It’s not *lying*, per se, but…exaggerating? And leaving out all the boring parts, of course. For example, I went to the Cheesecake Factory on Sunday. Exciting, right? But wait, it gets better. My friend told me she had gone to the Cheesecake Factory, her waiter was a cute guy named Robert G. and she ate the fried mac and cheese. So when our waiter introduced himself as Robert G., I was like um hello, now I HAVE to get the fried mac and cheese. Oh. My. Gosh.  It was amazing.You bite into them and it’s just like yummy macaroni with gooey cheese, covered in a deep-fried-ness of deliciousness. Does that make sense? If it doesn’t, get in your car right now and drive to the closest Cheesecake Factory. Ok go there NOW. NOW! Why are you still reading this?!?!?!! Blatant disobedience. Seesh.

But the best part, better than the fried mac and cheese or the chicken tacos my aunt got, was the menu. It’s filled with dumb, annoying ads like “Have no friends? Join this stupid website and you’ll get some! Maybe…” and “Hi, I’m Piccola Italiana! Go to my blog, spoonlighting.wordpress.com! It’s the best blog ever! Seriously! And you know it’s good because I never use exclamation points when I write because they’re super annoying and over-the-top cheesy happy!” and “Dude, why are you reading the ads? Find out what you want to eat. Dumbo…”. But the best ad was this one. Look at what the coupon code is.Hey, you want some designer fragrances? Do you also want to save 15%? Just enter the code cheese and you’ll immediately not want to buy these fragrances anymore. It made me laugh for a good 30 seconds. Then I went back to my Dr. Pepper. Because no matter how funny something is, it can’t take me away from my brown, cold, fizzy drink of delectableness. Mmmmm…. and then I went shopping at Forever 21. True story. And then yesterday I got a manicure. All I’m going to say about that is it’s probably only my 2nd-3rd manicure ever (and the first one I’ve gotten willingly), it was weird, slightly boring and the nail polish is already chipping. Basically, I’d rather spend my time doing something exciting than get my nails done. But my lovely aunt who is in town from the East Coast brought me there. And she’s super cool. And she paid for it, so I can’t bash it *too* much.

But anyway, reading all that, you’d think my life was pretty interesting right? I mean, I get good food, I go shopping, I get my nails done (blech). But what I don’t tell you is that today the most exciting thing I did was a puzzle. On my computer. Lamest thing ever.Like the title says, thank you internet for making me sound like I have a life and/or social life. I really appreciate it. And now I’m going to go celebrate that I finally finished that stupid puzzle. No, seriously.

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6 thoughts on “Thank you, internet, for making me look like I have a life.

  1. Dear goddaughter (or shall I call you ingrate daughter?),
    Consider that your last shopping spree/mani-pedi. Your 17th birthday present: L’Eau du Fromage.

    Love,
    Auntie Z

  2. Next time Z comes to visit, you might opt for something more exciting—like a pedicure!

    However, then you would not want to wear your Converse shoes, but rather sandals or flip flops, in order to show off your toes.

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