It’s July 7th. That means that summer is half over. What have you been doing this summer? I’ve been watching way too much House, hanging out with fantastic people who are in my freshman class, and killing fish.
So once upon a time, I decided it would be a good idea to get a fish. My roommate Emily and I thought it would be fun to have one in our dorm. Okay and by that I mean it was my idea to get a fish and all she said was, “…it’s going to die before we even get to college.” I wanted to prove her wrong, so I got one. We named it Harry and he lived on the bookshelf in my room. We even got Harry a trusty Asian sidekick statue named Ramen. Harry’s life was going just swimingly. *snicker* See what I did there? Yes, his life was wonderful… until I decided to take care of him.
The dumb fish wouldn’t eat. He’d eat the bubbles in his water, but wouldn’t eat the pellets unless they were crushed up, which was annoying to do. I took on the role of a loving mother and changed his water and tried not to tap the glass every time I walked by, but I didn’t give him too much attention. Then a few days ago he stopped swimming as much, and then he just sort of floated, and today he was lying at the bottom of the tank. I just assumed he liked sleeping there since it was closer to sea level. Less than two weeks after I paid a whole three bucks for him, poor Harry had kicked the can.
I decided to bury him in the backyard. I wanted other people to be there when I buried him, but only two of my six siblings offered to join me. They were my seven year old sister Brute and four year old Corrupted Brother. Corrupted Brother decided that his full name needed to be Harry Under Fish, so we put that on the headstone/brick. Brute hummed the Storm Trooper theme song as I put him into the makeshift grave, and after placing some of the pebbles from his tank and some fish food with him, Corrupted Brother said “Sorry I gave you a dumb name, Harry.” and we said goodbye to him forever. The sad part is that I’m actually more upset that I have a bowl of nasty fish pee water in my room that I’m too lazy to dump out than I am that he’s gone. #priorities
Also, House is the greatest show to ever grace this planet. The end.