And in the morning, I’m making raspberry waffles.

“I don’t know why more people don’t want to be friends with me,” she said in the most humble and confused way possible.

Don’t get me wrong, I may not have a huge amount of friends, but I couldn’t ask for better friends than the ones I do have. But why there are only like 10 of them is beyond me. Seriously, I am polite, can usually make people laugh (or at least nervously chuckle), and I can make great raspberry waffles. So what’s wrong with me? I mean sure I’m a little awkward and I take a while to warm up to people and I’m a stereotypical introvert (which you’d never guess by how much I talk on this blog, huh?), but do you think Einstein had social skills and liked unnecessary small talk? I didn’t think so. And yes, I just successfully compared myself to Einstein.

But enough about me and my Einstein-ian inability to behave normally around other people. Let’s talk about raspberry waffles. I thought I invented them until I googled “raspberry waffles” and about a billion pages popped up. As Einstein (back to him) says, “Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources,” so let’s just say I made up the idea of raspberry waffles all on my own, ok? I’ve noticed that I use the creativity is knowing how to hide your sources phrase a lot. Actually the other day I said it as well as “You can never be overdressed or overeducated” and “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt” all on the same person and I succeeded in totally confusing her. I was very happy. I mean, I felt sad for her that she couldn’t handle my impressive knowledge of random quotes, but happy I was able to use them correctly and annoy someone. My day would have been complete if I could have thrown in “Your mom goes to college” too. Oh well.

I strongly don’t recommend going for a half hour run and then coming home and eating two huge waffles. Actually, I really don’t recommend doing a lot of things that I do. For example, do not watch the season 6 finale of Psych and then when you get supermegaultra upset over the depressing cliffhanger ending, don’t go watch House just to find out that *SPOILER ALERT* Dr. Australian left the hospital that Dr. House’s team is at (I have no clue what the name of the hospital is because, again, I just started watching the show in season 8 and I’ve only seen a few episodes. And not once have they diagnosed someone with Lupus. Sad.) and that Dr. Guy who dies in dead poet society is going to die yet again. Seriously that guy must go after crazy roles because he wasn’t too mentally stable in Swing Kids either.

I’ve decided that maybe the reason people stay away from me is because I’m just a little too different. And an example to back up my theory is that the other day I was talking with this hilarious black girl and out of nowhere she was like “Girl, you crazy. But you alright.” That’s comforting…I guess?

Raspberry Waffles

Adapted from AllRecipes

2 eggs, divided
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 3/4 cups milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 tablespoons white sugar
4 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
8 oz fresh or frozen raspberries

Preheat waffle iron.
Beat eggs yolks in large bowl with until fluffy. Beat in flour, milk, vegetable oil, sugar, baking powder, salt and vanilla, just until smooth. In a separate bowl, beat egg whites then gently fold in the egg whites and raspberries.
Spray preheated waffle iron with non-stick cooking spray. Pour mix onto hot waffle iron. Cook until golden brown (you can tell if waffles are done if steam stops coming out the sides of the iron). Serve hot. Yum.
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“You are what you eat.” That’s funny, I don’t remember eating a legend.

But seriously, if you are what you eat then I’m a carbohydrate. One gigantic carb, deep fried and covered in chocolate sauce. Which is why I decided to make Sausage Egg muffins. Which I thought were healthy, until my mom just told me they had lots of fat. Well, bang goes that theory…

You know when you are craving a food that’s totally stupid, but you can’t stop thinking about it? That’s what these sausage egg muffins were doing to me. They’ve been beckoning me ever since I discovered the recipe last night. Yes, I said beckoning. I feel so poetic.

I woke up at 6am this morning to make them. When I got downstairs, my dog gave me a look like “whatchoo doing up so early, lady?” and I looked back like “stay outta my business, dog.” and then I realized I was telepathically speaking to a dog. So I stopped.

Oh and on top of all that, I made these on the always stressful Picture Day. Picture day for all us dorky homeschoolers usually involves 99% of us smiling like Steven from Nacho Libre.

True story.

But back to these muffins. They’re pretty amazing and so easy to make. And believe me when I say that. I always speak the truth about food. If something is easy, I’ll say it’s easy. If something tastes like death, then I’d say it tastes like death. Oh, and thanks to all the people who put up with with me and my strangeness. You guys are the bomb.

You basically make the sausage, cut up the broccoli, whisk the egg stuff, put it in muffin thingies, add cheese. Boom. Instant deliciousness.

I’m pretty sure the roads of heaven are lined with sausage and egg muffin flowers. Or something like that.

Oh and guess what else I got?

FINALLY! It came today. And I’m off to listen to it right now. Weirdly, I passed up on getting the other two CDs I wanted. Especially since on one CD, the singer is a freak and the other one I couldn’t take the singers seriously because of the ridiculous costumes…..And then I found $5. If you end your stories with that, it makes people forget the story was so incredibly boring. Did it work?

Sausage and Egg Muffins

Muchos gracis to Snacking in the Kitchen. The recipe was deeelish :)

Ingredients

1 pound Italian sausage
1 cup broccoli florets
8 large eggs
1/4 cup milk or half and half
1/2 tablespoon vegetable oil
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
salt and pepper to taste
grated cheddar cheese

Directions

Preheat oven to 375 F.

In a large skillet, brown sausage on medium high for about 5 minutes, or until no longer pink. Remove from heat and stir in broccoli.

Whisk together eggs, milk, oil and baking powder. Season with salt and pepper.

Lightly grease a 12-cupcake pan. Spoon out the sausage and broccoli mixture evenly into each cupcake slot..? (is that what it’s called?)

Ladle the egg mixture over sausage and broccoli.

Sprinkle with cheese.

Bake for 15-20 minutes.

Eat.

Who wants night breakfast?!

I made an incredibly fancy dish tonight, I call it Prima Colazione Della Notte. That loosely translates into English as Breakfast of the Night. Yeah, I made breakfast.*here come the excuses about why I didn’t make a real dinner* I was busy today. And, err…did stuff…like school and…worked on my social skills with other fellow homeschoolers. And read more about Louis Braille. And made a dress. Yes, you read that correctly. Me. Sewing. Being productive. Am I the only one shocked by that? And also my mom wanted something simple and easy.

I started off this elegant meal tonight with Eggo waffles, then followed it by extra delicious scrambled eggs and finished up it up with Jimmy Dean Pure Pork Sausage.

Jealous?

But 12 waffles, 9 eggs and 14 sausages later, my family still could have eaten more. We eat a lot.

Luckily, I didn’t bleed to death like I usually do at dog training class. And some little kid even told his mom that he wanted a dog like mine! *sniff* I must be doing something right! I was happy. And my social skills practice earlier today paid off and I actually talked to someone at class!!!! I’m popular and a good cook? Can life get better? I submit that it can NOT!